Weeks’s Bane

July 14th, 2009

Will you lookee here. Overnight-sensation fantasy-wunderkind extended-NYT-bestselling-author-of-Way-of-Shadows Brent Weeks has thrown down the gauntlet, and I is going to be opening a can of proverbial verbal whoop-ass on his … ass. Apparently. There are, in fact, some factual inaccuracies in his post. Chiefly that I haven’t weighed ten stone since 1992. But also his assertion that I wear lily-white trunks when everyone knows I go for pink leopard print with gold and silver tassles. I am FAMOUS for my trunks, and he KNOWS this.

Just look at him. Just LOOK at him. Mr book-every-month, with his oh-so-carefully manicured chinny beard. Doesn’t he know that Brent is a London Borough, not a proper christian name at all? I mean what’s next, an edgy fantasy duology written by Camden Months? A twelve-book series released over twelve hours by Marylebone Years?

And do you know what else? I don’t reckon he really can write a book a month. I mean who does he think he is, Brandon Sanderson? I reckon he spent ages writing all three books, and then they just released them over a three month period! Yeah! How about THAT?

Anyway, to the point. Me and Brent will be sharing guest duties at the Border’s Book Blog (sfnal section) for a month from, I believe, the 21st July, where they have already enjoyed starring appearances from writers such as the aforementioned Brandon Sanderson, China Mieville, Kim Harrison et al. Never before however have they hosted a DUEL TO THE DEATH (or mild embarrasment) between two GIANTS OF THE FIELD (or pygmies of the subgenre). Probably we’ll actually agree on everything of importance but we’ll do it in a REALLY ADVERSARIAL WAY. Anyway, drop by, comment, join in the fun as we TEAR EACH OTHERS BEARDS OUT HAIR BY HAIR. Or perhaps just discuss the fine points of authorial responsibility in a civilised manner.

Nice shirt, by the way. I think MY GRANDAD HAD ONE.

Posted in news by Joe Abercrombie on July 14th, 2009. Tags:

13 comments so far

  • Anonymous says:

    Actually his writing is often just as dark as yours.Some great characters that are as emotionally f***ed up as some of yours.


    Can you ask him that to occassionally cracks a joke.


  • Clambeard says:

    Off-topic but did you know "Best Served Cold" in HC seems to have disappeared at Amazon? What's up with that?

  • Suzann says:

    Just for a moment, I thought you said you would be in the smut dept.
    As author eye candy goes, you have him beat. But then I like the scruffy type

  • Bryce
    Sounds like my cup of emotionally f*cked up tea. Not sure what your metaphysical ps refers to…

    Just a glitch, I think.

    Aw, you are kind. Maybe they'll promote us to the smut department.

  • Bob Lock says:

    sic him Joe!

    BTW, just finished BSC and feel lost now without more Abercrombie to read so hurry up and get the next one done or I'll have to resort to writing again…

    BSC tests my knowledge of superlatives so I just won't bother trying to say how much I enjoyed it but needless to say, I'm so so jealous of your prose I could…

  • dyginc (Heather) says:


    Hello. I am a fan which i have mentioned before…i even was lucky enough to score an ARC of BSC which i have selfishly withheld my review which probably took me off Orbit's list but I will post soon…anywho the reason for this comment is that you and Brent are the two funniest guys I know…I have twittered this cage match and I have invited everyone on his ning site (which i moderate) to this wonderful match. I actually told him that if he went to London for the Gemmel (sorry you both lost) and had a pint with you I would make him bring every book of yours to sign for me…he rolled his eyes at that one…but none the less…I will do everything I can to promote this cool event! BTW I will post my very late review of BSC this weekend…sorry I got laid off from my job so my mind unfortunately has been focused on reality—bugger
    BTW thank you for participating in our book of the month club

  • Well he's not in SFX's hot top 50 list, unlike certain people…

  • marky says:

    Too funny!

    You had to mention the shirt. You couldn't just leave it alone. (My Granda had one like that too. We buried him in it so we wouldn’t have to see it again.)

    Pink leopard print with gold and silver tassels…So wrong, so very wrong.

  • enjai says:

    It's probably bordering on slash fiction, but there should be a video of a cage match with Joe in his famous trunks and Brent in his shirt…

    Just finished BSC and your prophetic signature of "let's face it, you'll love it" worked out (how about some lotto numbers?). My plan this morning was to read the 38 pages of BSC discussion on westeros but it's down. Aaarggghhh, need to confirm and speculate on it [starts cutting up pages of book to inject]

  • Anonymous says:

    For us poor souls across the pond, any chance someone might film this epic battle and post it to either one of your blogs?

    Since you recently posted some appearances, any chance of coming to the USA any time soon?


  • Reklatsterces says:

    Ahaha. Ha. Ha. I saw this on Brent's blog-forum-thing first, then yours. You are much more amusing and I am rooting for you. I have a vat of acid handy just in case Brent sabotages you, and it's a good thing tickets overseas are cheap in the GFC.

    PS – any chance of you getting a forum-blog-thing anytime soon?

  • KD Joshua says:


    I also have a shirt like that.

    Now, I have a question. Do you ever find it hard, or awkward, to get down onto paper what you want to convey to the reader? I'm trying to write my own piece of Fantasy and it's all just a mass of plot floating around my head. The characters feel real, and I know what I want to convey overall, but organizing it seems chaotic, and I feel somewhat overwhelmed trying to place everything together.

    When you wrote the trilogy, did you know everything that was going to happen throughout all three books? did you find yourself changing direction with some characters half-way through? How did you get organized?

    Sorry If I'm bombarding you with questions, but I felt more than inspired when I read your work. It gave me a push to start a story around a character I've had in my head for years.

    Any advice or comment would be ENORMOUSLY appreciated.

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